Twentysomething girl: What is the nastiest thing you can think of?
Twentysomething guy: A bloody vagina fart.

RIGHT……..
i got into rumors on friday night. I showed my i.d. and they fo sho read my bday and knew i wasnt 21. Luckies.
Had an early muthers day with the fam in anacortes. It was a good time. We looked at nordic tugs for about an hour. Those are some sickass modes of transportation.
Next time…mmmmmmyesm.

Girl #1: What’s the weirdest thing you had to do for work?
Girl #2: Well, Moussa told me he once had to dress up as a strawberry.

Hipster: C’mon, there’s another train, quit holding the doors. God.
Man squeezing past doors: Oh, shut the fuck up. I’m late for work. What are you late for? The vintage stores aren’t even open yet.